Pastoral Resources

In the summer of 1986, two ships collided in the Black Sea off the coast of Russia. Hundreds of passengers died as they were hurled into the icy waters below. News of the disaster was further darkened when an investigation revealed the cause of the accident. It wasn’t a technology problem like radar malfunction—or even thick fog. The cause was human stubbornness. Each captain was aware of the other ship’s presence nearby. Both could have steered clear, but according to news reports, neither captain wanted to give way to the other. Each was too proud to yield first. By the time they came to their senses, it was too late.

Officer Jim Heimerl, a Minneapolis policeman, was taking part in a 16.3 mile run in Grantsburg, Wisconsin. Jim was four miles into the race, in a cluster of runners not far off the pace of the leaders, when two deer ambled out of the woods and onto the road. The startled buck, no doubt distressed to find himself in the middle of a human marathon, began zigzagging wildly through the runners. Jim didn’t even see the animal until the two of them collided and sprawled together onto the asphalt highway. Jim fell flat on his face, received a concussion and opened a nasty gash on his forehead that required 23 stitches.

“Luckily there was a doctor running the race not far behind me,” Jim reported. “Because of the way my heart was pumping from running, I lost a lot of blood in a hurry. The doctor applied pressure and got it stopped.” The buck, however, paid an even higher price for his encounter. The collision broke his leg and his back, and the only humane response was to quickly dispense him to the ranks of the dearly departed.

Jim had already been admitted to a nearby hospital for repairs when state game officials called to tell him Wisconsin law holds that anyone who hits and kills a deer on a Wisconsin roadway can claim the deer. But since he didn’t feel up to dealing with a dead deer, and since he didn’t want to store the carcass in his station wagon in 80-degree heat while he recuperated overnight in the hospital, Jim declined the offer. He lamented his luck. “I hunt deer for 14 years without getting a thing, and then I get one while I’m running a race.”

The famous agnostic Thomas Huxley was once lovingly confronted by a very sincere Christian. This believer stressed to Huxley that he was not in any way impugning Huxley’s sincerity. Nevertheless, might it not be possible that mentally the great scientist was color blind? That is, some people cannot see traces of green where other people cannot help but see it. Could it be that this was Huxley’s problem—that he was simply blind to truth that was quite evident to others? Huxley, being a man of integrity, admitted that this was possible, and added that if it were, he himself, of course, could not know or recognize it.

Many of you know of Chuck Colson who was involved in the Watergate scandal but became a Christian in prison.� Now he is very involved in prison ministry and evangelism.� A few years ago a magazine article said that �prison radicalized the life of Chuck Colson.�� He says it is not so.� Rather, he says, �the Bible kept revealing to me God�s compassion for the hurting and suffering and oppressed; his insistent Word demanded that I care as he does� (Cox, Minister�s Manual 1995, 52).

A converted Chinese gentleman, when in America on a visit, was unfavorably impressed with the little difference he saw between the style of living of many professing Christians and the men and women of the world. Referring to the matter on one occasion he said, making at the same time a large sweep with his arm, "When the disciples of my country come out from the world, they come clear out."

A young fellow wanted to be a star journalist but lived in a small town (not much possibility). One day the dam upstream broke and the town was flooded. He got in a rowboat and headed out to look for a story. He found a lady sitting on her rooftop. He tied up the boat and told her what he was after. (They both watched as various items floated by). She says, “Now there’s a story.” “No, that’s not a story.” Finally a hat floats by and then does a 180 degree turn, goes upstream a ways and does another 180 degree turn, etc. The fellow says, “There’s a story.”

“Oh no, that’s not a story. That’s my husband Hayford. He said that he was going to mow the lawn come hell or high water!”

Come, Lord, and tarry not;

Bring the long-looked-for day;

O why these years of waiting here,

These ages of delay?

Come, for Thy saints still wait;

Daily ascends their sigh;

The Spirit and the Bride say,’Come’:

Dost Thou not hear the cry?

Come, for creation groans,

Impatient of Thy stay,

Worn out with these long years of ill,

These ages of delay.

Come, and make all things new;

Build up this ruined earth;

Restore our faded Paradise,

Creation’s second birth.

Come, and begin Thy reign

Of everlasting peace;

Come, take Thy Kingdom to Thyself,

Great King of Righteousness.

- Horatius Bonar

A little boy who for the first time saw the sign "Common," in Boston at the entrance of the great park known as Boston Common, called out joyfully, "It doesn't say, 'Keep Off the Grass'; it says, 'Comm on'!"

The New Testament was written in the common language of the people so that everybody could understand that the great sign reads, "Come on!"

It is often argued that we should stay in the midst of churches and bodies whose sins and follies we deplore, in the hope of saving them for God and mankind. Such reasoning has a good deal of force in the first stages of decline. A strong protest may arrest error and stop the gangrene. But as time advances, and the whole body becomes diseased; when the protests have been disregarded, and the arguments trampled underfoot; when the majority have clearly taken up their position against the truth—we have no alternative but to come out and be separate. The place from which we can exert the strongest influence for good is not from within, but from without. Lot lost all influence of his life in Sodom; but Abraham, from the heights of Mamre, was able to exert a mighty influence on its history.

Come, Lord, and tarry not;

Bring the long-looked-for day;

O why these years of waiting here,

These ages of delay?

Come, for Thy saints still wait;

Daily ascends their sigh;

The Spirit and the Bride say, ‘Come’:

Dost Thou not hear the cry?

Come, for creation groans,

Impatient of Thy stay,

Worn out with these long years of ill,

These ages of delay.

Come, and make all things new;

Build up this ruined earth;

Restore our faded Paradise,

Creation’s second birth.

Come, and begin Thy reign

Of everlasting peace;

Come, take Thy Kingdom to Thyself,

Great King of Righteousness.

Horatius Bonar

One night while conducting an evangelistic meeting in the Salvation Army Citadel in Chicago, Booth Tucker preached on the sympathy of Jesus. After his message a man approached him and said, “If your wife had just died, like mine has, and your babies were crying for their mother, who would never come back, you wouldn’t be saying what you’re saying.”

Tragically, a few days later, Tucker’s wife was killed in a train wreck. Her body was brought to Chicago and carried to the same Citadel for the funeral. After the service the bereaved preacher looked down into the silent face of his wife and then turned to those attending.

“The other day a man told me I wouldn’t speak of the sympathy of Jesus if my wife had just died. If that man is here, I want to tell him that Christ is sufficient. My heart is broken, but it has a song put there by Jesus. I want that man to know that Jesus Christ speaks comfort to me today.”

A preacher going to a country church one Sunday morning was overtaken by a deacon who remarked, "What a bitter cold morning, sir. I am sorry the weather is so wintry." "Oh," replied the minister, "I was just thanking God for keeping His Word." The man stared at him and asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, over 3,000 years ago God promised that cold and heat should not cease, so I am strengthened by this weather to emphasize the sureness of His promises."

Realizing there are legitimate differences in the Body of Christ over the matter of speaking in tongues, the CoMission has chosen to avoid promoting anything that would detract from the unity and effectiveness of CoMission teams. For this reason, CoMissioners are expected to refrain from the public exercise and promotion of the gift of tongues during their involvement in CoMission. The private exercise of tongues, however, is permitted.

The Scriptures often exhort us to be filled with various godly virtues—which means what? How do we know if we are “full of goodness” (Rom. 15:14), for example?

Think a moment about a water-saturated sponge. If we push down with our finger even slightly, water runs out onto the table. We immediately know what fills the interior pockets of the sponge. The same is true of ourselves. We can tell what fills us on the inside by what comes out under pressure.

Parishioners hard pressed for something to say to the clergy after the service have, according to one minister’s friend said to him,

“You always manage to find something to fill up the time.”

“I don’t care what they say, I like your sermons.”

“If I’d known you were going to be good today I’d have brought a neighbor.”

“Did you know there are 243 panes of glass in the windows?”

“We shouldn’t make you preach so often.”

“When I was a boy, my father, a baker, introduced me to the wonders of song,” tenor Luciano Pavarotti relates. “He urged me to work very hard to develop my voice. Arrigo Pola, a professional tenor in my hometown of Modena, Italy, took me as a pupil. I also enrolled in a teachers college. On graduating, I asked my father, ‘Shall I be a teacher or a singer?’ “‘Luciano,’ my father replied, ‘if you try to sit on two chairs, you will fall between them. For life, you must choose one chair.’ “I chose one. It took seven years of study and frustration before I made my first professional appearance. It took another seven to reach the Metropolitan Opera. And now I think whether it’s laying bricks, writing a book—whatever we choose—we should give ourselves to it. Commitment, that’s the key. Choose one chair.”

We have all seen John Wayne movies that made combat look like a romantic romp in the park. Men who have been through it tell a different story. The most graphic descriptions of battle I've read came from Bruce Catton's excellent books on the American Civil War, including The Army of the Potomac. They provide a striking understanding of the toughness of both Yankee and Rebel soldiers. Their lives were filled with deprivation and danger that is hardly imaginable today. It was not unusual for the troops to make a two-week forced march during which commanders would threaten the stragglers at sword-point.

The men were often thrown into the heat of a terrible battle just moments after reaching the front. They would engage in exhausting combat for days, interspersed by sleepless nights on the ground—sometimes in freezing rain or snow. During the battle itself, they ate a dry, hard biscuit called hardtack, and very little else. In less combative times, they could add a little salt pork and coffee to their diet. That was it! As might be expected, their intestinal tracks were regularly shredded by diarrhea, dysentery and related diseases that decimated their ranks. The Union Army reported upwards of 200,000 casualties from disease, often disabling up to 50 percent of the soldiers. The Confederates suffered a similar fate.

Combat experience itself was unbelievably violent in those days. Thousands of men stood toe to toe and slaughtered one another like flies. After one particularly bloody battle in 1862, 5,000 men lay dead in an area of two square miles. Twenty thousand more were wounded. One witness said it was possible to walk on dead bodies for 100 yards without once stepping on the ground. Many of the wounded remained where they fell among dead men and horses for 12 or 14 hours, with their groans and cries echoing through the countryside.

While their willingness to endure these physical deprivations is almost incomprehensible, one has to admire the emotional toughness of the troops. They believed in their cause, whether Union or Confederate, and they committed their lives to it. Most believed that they would not survive the war, but that was of little consequence.

Please understand that I do not see unmitigated virtue in the heroic visions of that day. Indeed, men were all too willing to put their lives on the line for a war they poorly understood. But their dedication and personal sacrifice remain today as memorials to their time.

There is, perhaps, no better illustration of this commitment to principle and honor than is seen in a letter written by major Sullivan Ballou of the Union Army. He penned it to his wife, Sarah, a week before the battle of Bull Run, July 14, 1861. They had been married only six years. These powerful words still tough my soul:

My Very Dear Sarah:

The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days—perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more ...

I have no misgivings about or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing, perfectly willing, to lay down all my joys in this life to help maintain this Government and to pay that debt...

Sarah, my love for you is deathless: it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break, and yet my love for country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly on, with all these chains to the battle-field.

The memories of all the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most deeply grateful to God, and you, that I have enjoyed them so long. And how hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together and seen our sons grown up to honorable manhood around us.

If I do not (return), my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battle-field, it will whisper your name. Forgive my many faults and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless, how foolish I have often-times been...

O Sarah, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you in the gladdest day and in the darkest night, amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours—always, always: and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall by my breath, or the cool air cools your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.

Sarah, do not mourn me dead: think I am gone, and wait for me, for we shall meet again...

Sullivan

Major Ballou was killed one week later in the first battle of Bull Run. I wonder, don't you, if he did indeed utter Sarah's name as he lay dying on the battlefield. She undoubtedly suffered the greater pain in the aftermath of that terrible war.

“I’m convinced that a man’s commitment to his message is measured by the significance of his words when he has to speak to only a handful of people.”

There is a tiny harbor town on the ocean shore where many ships have crashed on the rocks in violent weather. This town became well-known because of a dedicated rescue team which aided mariners in distress. The rescue team would rally to the sound of the siren and rush to the scene of the accident, risking life and limb to save the sailors from drowning. As time went on, the citizens of that tiny town raised enough money to build a rescue station close to the shore. While this greatly facilitated the operation, it softened the dedicated team as well. As time went by they added some of the comforts and conveniences that other rescue stations had. Through the years the rescue station became a social club where the town's people gathered to have fun and relax. Ships would still crash upon the rocks, the alarm would still sound, but eventually no one responded. They were reluctant to leave their comforts because their commitment to rescue the miserable mariners was no match for their complacency.

The next time a committee is appointed and the committee names several task forces to do its job, think of this story: To highlight its annual picnic one year, a company rented two racing shells and challenged a rival company to a boat race. The rival company accepted. On the day of the picnic, everyone entered into the spirit of the event. Women wore colorful summer dresses and big, floppy hats. Men wore straw skimmers and white pants. Bands played and banners waved. Finally the race began. To the consternation of the host company, the rival team immediately moved to the front and was never headed. It won by 11 lengths.

The management of the host company was embarrassed by its showing and promptly appointed a committee to place responsibility for the failure and make recommendations to improve the host team’s chances in a rematch the following year. The committee appointed several task forces to study various aspects of the race. They met for three months and issued a preliminary report.

In essence, the report said that the rival crew had been unfair. “They had eight people rowing and one coxswain steering and shouting out the beat,” the report said. “We had one person rowing and eight coxswains.” The chairman of the board thanked the committee and sent it away to study the matter further and make recommendations for the rematch. Four months later the committee came back with a recommendation. “Our guy has to row faster,” it said.

A traveler stopped to observe the curious behavior of a farmer who was plowing his field. A single mule hitched to the plow was wearing blinders, and the farmer was yelling, “Giddyap, Pete! Giddyap, Herb! Giddyap, Ol’ Bill! Giddyap, Jeb!”

After watching the farmer carry on like this for a while, the traveler asked, “Say, mister—how many names does that mule have?” “Just one—his name is Pete.” “Then why do you call out Herb and Bill and—”

“It’s like this,” explained the farmer. “If Ol’ Pete knew he was doing all this work alone, I couldn’t make him do it. But if he thinks he’s got three other mules workin’ alongside of him, he does the whole job all by himself.”

“What a marvelous idea!” exclaimed the traveler. And when he got back to his corporate office in New York, he invented the committee.

When you worry, which do you worry about, what might happen or what might not happen? Whichever, turn it around, to relieve anxiety. That’s common advice in Scotland. For worriers, the Scots have a proverb: “What may be, may not be.”

Hunger

Overuse of medication

Sleeping more or less than you usually do

Sleeping with your head under a pillow or blanket

A change in the weather

Stressful driving

Caffeine withdrawal

1) Low self-esteem,

2) Monotony and loneliness,

3) Stress from too many demands

4) Lack of time with husband,

5) Confusion about discipline,

6) Home atmosphere,

7) Need for outside role models,

8) Training of children.

One day, in Springfield, a neighbor of Lincoln's was drawn to his door by the sound of crying children. He saw Lincoln passing by with his two sons both crying lustily. "What is the matter with the boys?" asked the man. "The same that is the matter with the whole world!" answered Lincoln. "I have three walnuts, and each boy wants two."

A new survey conducted by the Barna Research Group reveals widespread ignorance of common Christian terms. Researchers asked a sample group of 1,210 adults to define Great Commission, evangelical, John 3:16, and gospel. In each case, only a small minority gave accurate answers. Even “born-again Christians” had trouble answering.

Only nine percent of the respondents accurately defined Great Commission. About 75 percent of born-again Christians could not offer a definition.

Eighteen percent of the respondents correctly defined evangelical, with 57 percent of born-again Christians unable to give a definition.

Twenty-five percent of the respondents gave accurate or partially accurate descriptions of John 3:16, and half of the born-again Christians could not offer a definition.

Thirty-seven percent of the respondents correctly defined gospel, and 16 percent of born-again Christians could not offer a definition.

These terms “clearly do not convey the intended meaning to the masses,” concluded George Barna, president of Barna Research Group. “The fact that so few of the insiders understand the meaning of these terms also suggests that the Christian church in this country would be wise to invest in training people about the basic principles and concepts of the Christian faith.”

Dr. Robert Travis, co-director of Marital and Health Studies at the Univ. of Alabama, lists the most common complaints of husbands and wives:

WIVES: He doesn’t listen to me, He takes me for granted, He’s not romantic, He doesn’t help much with the children.

HUSBANDS: She doesn’t understand that I need time by myself, She nags about little things, She expects too much emotionally, She complains that I spend too much time at work.

We all have regrets, according to Dr. Richard Kinnier of Arizona State Univ. The most common regret was not being a better student, not studying more. Other common regrets include not being more assertive, not having more self-discipline, not taking more risks, not spending quality time with families. One surprise showed up: money appears to be insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

Admiral Hyman G. Rickover, father of the nuclear submarine, was skeptical of business school graduates. Having interviewed some 14,000 of them over a period of years, he found them fluent in the jargon of systems analysis, financial manipulation, and quantitative management (whatever that is). But he claimed that they just don’t know the score. He felt most of them had an unrealistic impression of what is involved in business and little appreciation of the importance of technical knowledge, experience, and hard work. “What it takes to do the job will not be learned from management courses,” said Rickover. “It is principally a matter of experience, the proper attitude, and common sense—none of which can be taught in a classroom.”

The man who charges up to a perfect stranger and demands, "Are you saved?" may indeed be zealous for the Lord, but he shows very little understanding or love for his fellowman. His tactless approach indicates that he has no real interest in the man as a person, but only as a potential candidate for conversion, an object to witness to. Common sense is essential even in witnessing. Remember this. You should witness not for the sake of witnessing but for the purpose of winning souls to Christ. As a fisher of men you must exercise judgment in casting the net. Or, to change the simile, you must hold your fire until you see the target. Firing your rifle into the air will not accomplish anything. Let this be the judgment you exercise as a steward of the higher truths of life.

The Los Angeles Times recently printed a sampling of signs from around the world that attempted to communicate in English.

In a hotel elevator in Paris: “Please leave your values at the front desk.”

In a hotel in Zurich: “Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.”

On the door of a Moscow inn: “If this is your first visit to Russia, you are welcome to it.”

In a Soviet newspaper: “There will be a Moscow exhibition of arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.”

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: “The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.”

What we intend to say and what others hear us saying are not always the same thing. We need to pray that God will help us clearly communicate the gospel (Col. 4:4).

Communication breakdown is an oft-cited culprit in marital problems. If you sometimes feel your mate just doesn’t understand you (who doesn’t feel that way now and then?), maybe the problem lies in what you’re doing. H. Norman Wright offers 10 tips for talking:

1. Be a ready listener and do not answer until the other person has finished talking.

2. Be slow to speak. Think first. Don’t be hasty in your words. Speak in such a way that the other person can understand and accept what you say.

3. Speak the truth always, but do it in love. Do not exaggerate.

4. Do not use silence to frustrate your spouse. Explain why you are hesitant to talk at this time.

5. Do not quarrel. It is possible to disagree without quarreling.

6. Do not respond in anger. Use a soft and kind response.

7. When you are in the wrong, admit it and ask your mate for forgiveness. When someone confesses to you, tell them you forgive them. Be sure it is also forgotten and not brought up again.

8. Avoid nagging.

9. Do not blame or criticize the other, but restore them, encourage them and edify them. If someone verbally attacks, criticizes or blames you, do not respond in the same manner.

10. Try to understand the other person’s opinion. Make allowances for differences. Be concerned about your mate’s interests.

In following these 10 guidelines, here are some scriptures worth reading and remembering: Job 19:2, Proverbs 18:21, Proverbs 25:11, James 3:8-10, 1 Peter 3:10-11.

A woman went to a lawyer and said she wanted a divorce. The lawyer got out his note pad, and proceeded to ask her some questions.

“Do you have any grounds?” he inquired.

“Oh, yes,” she replied. “About three-quarters of an acre.”

The lawyer paused for a moment, then queried, “Do you have a grudge?”

“No,” the woman answered quickly. “But we do have a lovely carport.”

Again the lawyer paused and then asked, “Does he beat you up?”

“No. I get up before he does every morning,” the woman reported.

Finally the lawyer blurted, “Lady, why do you want to divorce your husband?”

“It’s because,” she explained, “that man can’t carry on an intelligent conversation.”

One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos and pierced nose.

Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. �Dear,� said the mother diplomatically, �he doesn't seem very nice.�

�Oh please, Mom,� replied the daughter, �if he wasn�t nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?�

Imagine, if you will, that you work for a company whose president found it necessary to travel out of the country and spend an extended period of time abroad. So he says to you and the other trusted employees, “Look, I’m going to leave. And while I’m gone, I want you to pay close attention to the business. You manage things while I’m away. I will write you regularly. When I do, I will instruct you in what you should do from now until I return from this trip.”

Everyone agrees. He leaves and stays gone for a couple of years. During that time he writes often, communicating his desires and concerns. Finally he returns. He walks up to the front door of the company and immediately discovers everything is in a mess--weeds flourishing in the flower beds, windows broken across the front of the building, the gal at the front desk dozing, loud music roaring from several offices, two or three people engaged in horseplay in the back room. Instead of making a profit, the business has suffered a great loss.

Without hesitation he calls everyone together and with a frown asks, “What happened? Didn’t you get my letters?” You say, “Oh, yeah, sure. We got all your letters. We’ve even bound them in a book. And some of us have memorized them. In fact, we have ‘letter study’ every Sunday. You know, those were really great letters.”

I think the president would then ask, “But what did you do about my instructions?” And, no doubt the employees would respond, “Do? Well, nothing. But we read every one!”

While living in Florida, I had several friends who worked cleaning rooms at a nationally-known inn located directly on the white sands of the Gulf of Mexico. They spent their work breaks running barefoot in the sand. The problem was the inn required all employees to wear shoes at all times while working. I noticed the employees responded in one of two ways. The majority thought the rule restricted their freedom. The rooms had shag carpeting, delightful to bare toes, and just a few steps away lay the beach. To them, the rule to wear shoes was nothing more than employer harassment.

But a minority of the employees looked at the rule differently. Sometimes late night parties would produce small pieces of broken glass. Occasionally a stickpin would be found hidden in the deep shag piles. Some knew the pain of skinning bare toes on the steel bed frame while making a bed. The minority saw the rule as protection, not restriction.

Were Gold’s laws written to make life miserable? Or were they written by a loving heavenly Father who cares about His children?

- Timothy Munyon

The teaching that the human consists of three parts: body, soul, and spirit.

The two entities SOUL and SPIRIT are carefully distinguished in both Old and New Testaments. The word SOUL translated from NEPHESH in Hebrew and PSYCHE in Greek represents the living principle of the body, and is shared by man and the animals. On the fifth day of creation, as God created animal life in the oceans, and birds, He designated them as having “life” (Gen. 1:20), or NEPHESH. On the sixth day, “Man became a living SOUL” (Gen. 2:7) as well.

The soul refers to desires and appetites both of the flesh and the mind, perhaps summed up by the word “consciousness.” Plants, while alive in the biological sense, are not conscious (this may also be true for certain other “lower” organisms classified as animals by modern biology), and therefore not alive in the Biblical sense, nor does their death imply Biblical “death.”

The SPIRIT is quite different. God Himself “breathed into (man’s) nostrils the breath (RUACH) of life” (Gen. 2:7), thereby imparting only to mankind some measure of His own spiritual nature. It is noteworthy, that while God identified as “Spirit” (John 4:24—Greek PNEUMA), nowhere is He identified as “soul.” He stands separate from mere beings, not driven by the same desires as animals and man.

The spirit, then, is the recreated “image of God” (Gen. 1L27) in man, separating us from animals, while bonding us to God. This spiritual side makes possible an earthly life in tune with God and an eternal life as a son of God.

Among the apostles, the one absolutely stunning success was Judas, and the one thoroughly groveling failure was Peter. Judas was a success in the ways that most impress us: he was successful both financially and politically. He cleverly arranged to control the money of the apostolic band; he skillfully manipulated the political forces of the day to accomplish his goal. And Peter was a failure in ways that we most dread: he was impotent in a crisis and socially inept. At the arrest of Jesus he collapsed, a hapless, blustering coward; in the most critical situations of his life with Jesus, the confession on the road to Caesarea Philippi and the vision on the Mount of transfiguration, he said the most embarrassingly inappropriate things. He was not the companion we would want with us in time of danger, and he was not the kind of person we would feel comfortable with at a social occasion.

Time, of course, has reversed our judgments on the two men. Judas is now a byword for betrayal, and Peter is one of the most honored names in the church and in the world. Judas is a villain; Peter is a saint. Yet the world continues to chase after the successes of Judas, financial wealth and political power, and to defend itself against the failures of Peter, impotence and ineptness.

Childhood Faith

Mature Adult Faith

Good Christians don’t have pain or disappointment.

God uses our pain and disappointment to make us better Christians

God helps those who help themselves.

God helps those who admit their own helplessness.

God wants to make us happy.

God wants to make us into the image of Jesus.

Faith will help us always explain what God is doing (things always work out).

Faith helps us stand under God’s sovereignty even when we have no idea what God is doing.

The closer we get to God, the more perfect we become

The closer we get to God, the more we become aware of our own sinfulness.

Mature Christians have answers.

Mature Christians can wrestle honestly with tough questions because we trust that God has the answers.

Good Christians are always strong.

Our strength is in admitting our weakness.

We go to church because our friends are there, we have great leaders, and we get something out of it.

We go to church because we belong to the body of Christ.

Let’s take the year 1960 and compare the value system in that day with America’s social attitudes three decades later. On the other end, let’s designate 1990 as the second marker. What significant changes occurred during that 30-year period?

In 1960, everyone knew that a family meant a husband and wife with or without children. The law defined it a bit more broadly, as people related by blood, marriage, and adoption. Most children were cared for by their parents, and most politicians knew that any effort to strengthen the family was a good idea.

In 1990, politicians can’t even agree on what “traditional” families are or whether they are worthy of special assistance. Indeed, a major movement is underway to redefine “family” to mean any group of people which merely thinks of itself as family.

A sizable minority of children is supervised by professional caregivers, while some children, called “latchkey” kids, are left with no adult care at all during much of the day. Some opinion leaders point to broken homes, out-of-wedlock pregnancies, and homosexual “couples,” not as reasons for alarm, but rather as evidence of healthy family diversity and pluralism.

In 1960, there was a general consensus that religion was a positive influence in American life and that it should be encouraged. Our children routinely began the school day with a simple prayer or moment of silence. It was common at Christmas time to see a nativity scene near city hall. Public service ads on TV urged families to attend church together on Sunday. A billboard read, “The family that prays together, stays together.”

Today a militant secularism prevails. Any public display of religion, whether a prayer at a high school commencement or a cross on top of a firehouse, is immediately attacked by civil libertarian attorneys.

Recently several government officials in Washington, D.C., called on citizens to join in a day of prayer to ask God to lead the city out of its quagmire of drugs, crime, and suffering. They were immediately attacked by a local ACLU official who told the Washington Post, “It is always inappropriate for government officials to ask citizens to pray.”

Lincoln, Jefferson and Roosevelt, among others, would be surprised to hear such an absurd statement, but it is the accepted wisdom today. Our federal courts seem committed to an interpretation of the Constitution that increasingly narrows the ground upon which religious faith is permitted to tread.

In 1960, out-of-wedlock pregnancy was a matter of shame. When it happened, couples often did a quaint thing—they got married, so that the child would have a name and the influence of a father. Girls who “slept around” were often ostracized by their fellow students. A pregnant teenage was sent away to have the child rather than risk the censure of the community.

In 1990, one out of five babies born in America was conceived out of wedlock. In Washington, D.C., illegitimacy was an alarming 55 percent! In many schools, the virtuous girl was considered odd, and was subjected to the same scorn and ridicule once reserved for the “easy” date 30 years earlier. Surveys revealed that many of our sons and daughters were embarrassed to admit their virginity.

In 1960, a divorce was enough to end a politician’s career. Most couples stayed together for life. Now more than one million children are affected by divorce every year. Mates are traded in for newer models as if they were cars. For each of the last 15 years, there have been more than one million divorces compared to less than half that many in the early ‘60s.

In 1960, homosexuality was still “in the closet.” It was, as it has been for centuries, “the love that dared not speak its name.” The psychiatric profession treated homosexuality as a metal disorder or dysfunction. No politician could survive the disclosure of being homosexual. The notion that special civil rights should be granted to people on the basis of their “sexual orientation” was an absurdity. The word “gay” meant happy.

Today there are few political and social movements as aggressive, powerful, or successful as “gay rights” advocates. Homosexuality is no longer considered a dysfunction but rather an orientation or a “sexual preference.” If you oppose homosexuality or condemn it from a moral perspective, you risk being labeled “homophobic”—a “sickness” described as a fear or loathing of homosexuality.

College students who oppose the gay rights agenda on their campuses are expelled for discrimination. Gay politicians celebrate their homosexuality and are routinely reelected. Even a homosexual Congressman who allegedly seduced several male pages was returned to office, and Massachusetts Congressman Barney Frank, who admitted paying for sex with a male prostitute, merely received a slap on the wrist by his fellow Congressmen.

In 1960, students in every American classroom began their day with the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag. History books widely used in the schools explained the religious heritage of the nation and were peppered with stirring illustrations of America’s heroes and heroines. Most universities had a solid core curriculum that taught the classics of Western civilization. Students were expected to be familiar with the great writers and philosophers of our culture, as well as our Judeo-Christian heritage.

In 1990, the burning of the American flag was designated by the Supreme Court as a form of free speech, protected by the Constitution. In many American cities, the Pledge of Allegiance is not repeated at all or was suspended after the first few years of school.

"Aunt Mary was very kind to stay with you this afternoon," said a mother to the small convalescent whom she had left in care of a relative, and whose wearied little face an hour later did not speak well for the success of the experiment. "I hope you are not overly tired when she was trying so hard to amuse you." "She wasn't; she just wanted to amuse herself reading a book of hers to me when I wanted to play puzzles," was the truthful reply.

There are two ways of handling pressure. One is illustrated by a bathysphere, the miniature submarine used to explore the ocean in places so deep that the water pressure would crush a conventional submarine like an aluminum can. Bathyspheres compensate with plate steel several inches thick, which keeps the water out but also makes them heavy and hard to maneuver. Inside they’re not alone. When their lights are turned on and you look through the tiny, thick plate-glass windows, what do you see? Fish! These fish cope with extreme pressure in an entirely different way. They don’t build thick skins; they remain supple and free. They compensate for the outside pressure through equal and opposite pressure inside themselves.

Christians, likewise, don’t have to be hard and thick-skinned—as long as they appropriate God’s power within to equal the pressure without.

The careless soul receives the Father’s gifts as if it were a way things had of dropping into his hand...yet he is ever complaining, as if someone were accountable for the problems which meet him at every turn. For the good that comes to him, he gives no thanks—who is there to thank? At the disappointments that befall him he grumbles—there must be someone to blame! - George MacDonald

Wabush, a town in a remote portion of Labrador, Canada, was completely isolated for some time. But recently a road was cut through the wilderness to reach it. Wabush now has one road leading into it, and thus, only on one road leading out. If someone would travel the unpaved road for six to eight hours to get into Wabush, there is only way he or she could leave—-by turning around.

Each of us, by birth, arrives in a town called Sin. As in Wabush, there is only one way out—a road built by God himself. But in order to take that road, one must first turn around. That complete about face is what the Bible calls repentance, and without it, there’s no way out of town.

The rich get richer and the poor get poorer—and it seems that compound interest would virtually guarantee it! Not so, according to investment counselor David Dreman. Writing in Forbes magazine, Dreman noted that most large fortunes diminish and sometimes disappear in only two or three generations. He observed, “Why most nest eggs dissipate over time is a major problem...”

The exec was making a presentation to the company board. “Computers have allowed us to cut costs,” he explained. “We expect even more dramatic improvements as computers become increasingly self-sufficient.” He unveiled a large chart showing a man, a dog, and a computer. “Here is our organization plan of the future.”

“What kind of plan is that?” demanded a board member.

“It’s simple,” replied the exec. “The man’s job is to feed the dog. The dog’s job is to bite the man if he touches the computer.”

Depression strikes about 10 million Americans within any six-month period. Human therapists can now treat only a fraction of that number. But a study shows that by using computers, more of these persons might be helped. In the American Journal of Psychiatry, researcher John Greist presented a study showing that depressed people treated by computerized questions and answers improved just as much as those consulted under a human therapist.

Post Office is spending millions on program to read addresses: Associated Press Merrifield, Va.

Computers are being trained to do the impossible: Read sloppy handwriting. Already in 34 cities, computer software is helping read handwritten addresses. But the system still has a long way to go.

The Remote Computer Reader likes numbers written in third-grade, block style. But the computer finds it easier to read cursive—as long as it’s not too showy. And no Old English, thank you.

The reader’s memory is somewhere inside a blue box of computer circuit boards in an out-of-the-way, gray room at the Postal Service’s Engineering and Development Center in suburban Virginia.

“Here it is,” program manager Al Lawson says, showing off the read-your-writing machine. “It’s not very exciting. It’s a box.”

About $6 million has already been spent to get the Remote Control Reader up and running in the 34 cities. By the end of the year, the software will be at all 254 of the post office’s main processing sites, sorting nearly one-quarter of the estimated 8 billion pieces of handwritten mail that move through the Postal Service every year, Lawson said.

Right now, it reads 10 percent to 14 percent. Although it correctly sorted four of 20 test letters penned by employees of The Associated Press—a 20 percent success rate.

It was confused by a sample letter addressed to “200 West Ave. E.” Another had too much space between the numbers in the 45140 ZIP code of Loveland, Ohio. The first two numbers in the 61937 ZIP to Lovington, Ill., were touching on a third, but the machine still got this one right.

In all, the machine couldn’t sort 16 of the 20 test letters. They would have had to be routed by one of the 22,000 workers nationwide who manually key in destinations.

Tom Fahey, communications director for the American Postal Workers Union, said the new technology could mean the loss of jobs in upcoming years. But he said the workers might be needed for other postal work by the time the system is perfected.

That’s Stanley Turk’s job.

The systems analyst plopped down in front of a color computer monitor and called up a fictional test letter addressed to: John Johnson on Saddle Notch Drive in Loveland, Colo., 80537.

Sloppy writing caused instant problems.

The first two digits of the ZIP code ran together. Also, the sender wrote an oversized, European-style No. 7—one with a horizontal slash through its vertical line.

“It read the seven as a two,” Turk said.

The machine also was stumped on a sample letter being sent to 1 Lakeshore Drive in Valentine, Neb., 69201. The machine thought a small, partial circle meant to be a zero was an extraneous mark on the envelope, maybe ink from a messy pen.

Turk says the machines are programmed to filter out other things, too, like postmarks, stamps, logos—even “Ed McMahon staring you in the face saying you’ve already won.”

In a half-second, the computer goes through an extensive checklist, gaining confidence at each step about sending a letter to a certain destination.

First, it searches for the address. Then it breaks it into units of information like the post office box number or ZIP code.

“It took more than five years of research just to get the computer to find the address block,” Turk says. “It’s still not perfect.”

Next, the computer looks for a five-digit ZIP, comparing each number with ones etched in its memory. If it can decode the ZIP, it automatically knows the city and state.

Then instead of trying to identify the street name, it tries to decipher the street number. That’s easier.

If the street number is 10, for example, the computer searches its memory for all addresses within the ZIP that begin with that number—10 Main St., 10 Commerce Ave., 10 E. Greenway Blvd. This list includes all variations such as 10 East Greenway Boulevard.

The next step is a bit tricky.

The computer traces the handwritten street name, keeping track of how many times upstrokes become downstrokes; downstrokes become upstrokes. It approximates the number of characters. Then it tries to find a probable address match on the list.

“If it’s too close to call,” Turk says, “the computer says: ‘Let an operator key it.’”

Post Office is spending millions on program to read addresses

Associated Press:

Merrifield, Va.—Computers are being trained to do the impossible: Read sloppy handwriting.

Already in 34 cities, computer software is helping read handwritten addresses. But the system still has a long way to go.

The Remote Computer Reader likes numbers written in third-grade, block style. But the computer finds it easier to read cursive—as long as it’s not too showy. And no Old English, thank you.

The reader’s memory is somewhere inside a blue box of computer circuit boards in an out-of-the-way, gray room at the Postal Service’s Engineering and Development Center in suburban Virginia.

“Here it is,” program manager Al Lawson says, showing off the read-your-writing machine. “It’s not very exciting. It’s a box.”

About $6 million has already been spent to get the Remote Control Reader up and running in the 34 cities. By the end of the year, the software will be at all 254 of the post office’s main processing sites, sorting nearly one-quarter of the estimated 8 billion pieces of handwritten mail that move through the Postal Service every year, Lawson said.

Right now, it reads 10 percent to 14 percent. Although it correctly sorted four of 20 test letters penned by employees of The Associated Press—a 20 percent success rate.

It was confused by a sample letter addressed to “200 West Ave. E.” Another had too much space between the numbers in the 45140 ZIP code of Loveland, Ohio. The first two numbers in the 61937 ZIP to Lovington, Ill., were touching on a third, but the machine still got this one right.

In all, the machine couldn’t sort 16 of the 20 test letters. They would have had to be routed by one of the 22,000 workers nationwide who manually key in destinations.

Tom Fahey, communications director for the American Postal Workers Union, said the new technology could mean the loss of jobs in upcoming years. But he said the workers might be needed for other postal work by the time the system is perfected.

That’s Stanley Turk’s job.

The systems analyst plopped down in front of a color computer monitor and called up a fictional test letter addressed to: John Johnson on Saddle Notch Drive in Loveland, Colo., 80537.

Sloppy writing caused instant problems.

The first two digits of the ZIP code ran together. Also, the sender wrote an oversized, European-style No. 7—one with a horizontal slash through its vertical line.

“It read the seven as a two,” Turk said.

The machine also was stumped on a sample letter being sent to 1 Lakeshore Drive in Valentine, Neb., 69201. The machine thought a small, partial circle meant to be a zero was an extraneous mark on the envelope, maybe ink from a messy pen.

Turk says the machines are programmed to filter out other things, too, like postmarks, stamps, logos—even “Ed McMahon staring you in the face saying you’ve already won.”

In a half-second, the computer goes through an extensive checklist, gaining confidence at each step about sending a letter to a certain destination.

First, it searches for the address. Then it breaks it into units of information like the post office box number or ZIP code.

“It took more than five years of research just to get the computer to find the address block,” Turk says. “It’s still not perfect.”

Next, the computer looks for a five-digit ZIP, comparing each number with ones etched in its memory. If it can decode the ZIP, it automatically knows the city and state.

Then instead of trying to identify the street name, it tries to decipher the street number. That’s easier.

If the street number is 10, for example, the computer searches its memory for all addresses within the ZIP that begin with that number—10 Main St., 10 Commerce Ave., 10 E. Greenway Blvd. This list includes all variations such as 10 East Greenway Boulevard.

The next step is a bit tricky.

The computer traces the handwritten street name, keeping track of how many times upstrokes become downstrokes; downstrokes become upstrokes. It approximates the number of characters. Then it tries to find a probable address match on the list.

“If it’s too close to call,” Turk says, “the computer says: ‘Let an operator key it.’”

O Lord, remember not only the men and woman of good will, but also those of ill will. But do not remember all of the suffering they have inflicted upon us:

Instead remember the fruits we have borne because of this suffering—our fellowship, our loyalty to one another, our humility, our courage, our generosity, the greatness of heart that has grown from this trouble.

When our persecutors come to be judged by you, let all of these fruits that we have borne be their forgiveness.

(Found in the clothing of a dead child at Ravensbruck concentration camp.)

Concerned that his students were not really learning the material, an algebra teacher sent a note home to parents, asking them not to do any to the homework assigned to their children. The next day, one student turned in a reply from his parents:

“Dear Mr. Wood, we are flattered that you think we could.”

Imagine that you are a world-class concert pianist at the peak of your career, someone who has spent years studying and practicing to develop your art. Your fingers respond instantly to your mental commands, flitting along the keyboard with grace and speed. Then one day you feel a stiffness that wasn’t there before. You go to a doctor, tests are done, and the diagnosis comes back: arthritis. Your fingers are destined to become wooden and crippled. From the heights of success and acclaim you will plunge to oblivion.

It happened to Byron Janis. Within a short time this concert pianist saw arthritis quickly spread to all his fingers, and the joints of nine of them fused. Some people would have never recovered from such a blow, but Janis decided to fight back. He kept his ailment a secret from all but his wife and two close friends. He worked long hours to change his technique. He learned how to use what strengths he had instead of concentrating on his weaknesses. He also used a regimen of medications, acupuncture, ultrasound, and even hypnosis to deal with the pain. His wife learned how to give him therapeutic massages to loosen his stiff joints.

Through hard work and sheer determination, Janis was able to continue his career. He maintained a full concert schedule for 12 years without anyone suspecting. Finally, he told the world at a White House concert in 1985. These days, he is active in fund-raising for the Arthritis Foundation and still plays the piano. He credits faith, and hope, and will for his success and says, “I have arthritis, but it doesn’t have me.”

Some Christians know so little of victory because they have failed to recognize a conflict. Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate. In THE GRACE OF GIVING, Stephen Olford tells of a Baptist pastor during the American Revolution, Peter Miller, who lived in Ephrata, Pennsylvania, and enjoyed the friendship of George Washington. In Ephrata also lived Michael Wittman, an evil-minded sort who did all he could to oppose and humiliate the pastor.

One day Michael Wittman was arrested for treason and sentenced to die. Peter Miller traveled seventy miles on foot to Philadelphia to plead for the life of the traitor.

“No, Peter,” General Washington said. “I cannot grant you the life of your friend.”

“My friend!” exclaimed the old preacher. “He’s the bitterest enemy I have.”

“What?” cried Washington. “You’ve walked seventy miles to save the life of an enemy? That puts the matter in different light. I’ll grant your pardon.” And he did.

Peter Miller took Michael Wittman back home to Ephrata—no longer an enemy but a friend.

Lynn Jost

Nineteenth-century inventor Gail Borden was obsessed with the idea of condensing food. His first effort, a condensed “meat biscuit,” failed miserably. But an ocean voyage gave birth to a better idea. Borden was concerned about the sickly condition of the children on board. Cows on the ship were too seasick to produce healthy milk, and four children died from drinking contaminated milk. Borden was determined to condense milk so that it would be safe and easily transported.

After many tries, he devised a vacuum process that removed water from milk. Conditions during the Civil War made the canned milk a success, and Borden make a fortune. His epitaph, inscribed on a tomb the shape of a milk can, was, “I tried and failed; I tried again and again, and succeeded.”

A young soldier, while dying very happily, broke out in singing the following stanza: “Great Jehovah, we adore thee, God the Father, God the Son, God the Spirit, joined in glory on the same eternal throne: Endless praised to Jehovah, three in one.” The chaplain then asked if he had any message to send his friends. “Yes,” said he. “Tell my father that I have tried to eat my meals with thanksgiving.” “Tell him that Christ is now all my hope, all my trust, and that he is precious to my soul.” “Tell him that I am not afraid to die—all is calm” “Tell him that I believe Christ will take me to himself, and to my dear sister who is in heaven.”

The voice of the dying boy faltered in the intervals between these precious sentences. When the hymn commencing, “Nearer, my God to thee,” was read to him, at the end of each stanza he exclaimed, with striking energy, “Oh Lord Jesus, thou are coming nearer to me.” Also at the end of each stanza of the hymn (which was also read to him) commencing, “Just as I am—without one plea, But that thy blood was shed for me, And that thou bid’st me come to thee, O Lamb of God, I come,” he exclaimed, “I Come! O Lamb of God, I Come!” Speaking again of his friends, he said, “Tell my father that I died happy.”

His last words were, “Father, I’m coming to thee!” Then the Christian soldier sweetly and calmly “fell asleep in Jesus.”

The C.S.S. Hunley, a confederate submarine, was originally a boiler, which was made into a 60’ long, cigar shaped sub. Eight men turned a crank attached to a propeller to produce movement, and the ship’s weapon was on explosive charge on a 15-foot pole attached to the bow. The Hunley was actually a deathtrap. More than a dozen men, including H.L. Hunley, the inventor, drowned or suffocated in test dives before the submarine was ready for battle. On February 17, 1964, off the harbor at Charleston, S.C., the Hunley attacked the Union ship Housatonic, crippling the enemy ship but going to the bottom with the victim.

Not too many years ago newspapers carried the story of Al Johnson, a Kansas man who came to faith in Jesus Christ. What made his story remarkable was not his conversion, but the fact that as a result of his newfound faith in Christ, he confessed to a bank robbery he had participated in when he was nineteen years old. Because the statute of limitations on the case had run out, Johnson could not be prosecuted for the offense. Still, he believed his relationship with Christ demanded a confession. And he even voluntarily repaid his share of the stolen money!

“Wash me!” was the anguished prayer of King David.

“Wash!” was the message of John the Baptist.

“Unless I wash you, you have no part with me,” said the towel-draped Jesus to Peter.

Without our being washed clean, we all die from the contamination of sin. For God’s sake, wash.

Boyce Mouton

Four men of the cloth, taking a short breather from their heavy schedules, were on a park bench, chatting and enjoying an early spring day.

“You know, since all of us are such good friends,” said one, “this might be a good time to discuss the problems that are disturbing us.” They all nodded in agreement.

“Well, I would like to share with you the fact that I drink to excess,” said one.

There was a gasp from the other three. Then another spoke up. “Since you were so honest, I’d like to say that my big problem is gambling. It’s terrible, I know, but I can’t quit. I’ve even been tempted to take money from the collection plate.”

Another gasp was heard, and the third clergyman spoke. “I’m really troubled, brothers, because I’m growing fond of a woman in my church—a married woman.”

More gasps. But the fourth man remained silent. After a few minutes the others coaxed him to open up. “The fact is,” he said, “I just don’t know how to tell you about my problem.”

“It’s all right, brother. Your secret is safe with us.”

“Well, it’s this way,” he said. “You see, I’m an incurable gossip.”

The American painter, John Sargent, once painted a panel of roses that was highly praised by critics. It was a small picture, but it approached perfection. Although offered a high price for it on many occasions, Sargent refused to sell it. He considered it his best work and was very proud of it. Whenever he was deeply discouraged and doubtful of his abilities as an artist, he would look at it and remind himself, “I painted that.” Then his confidence and ability would come back to him.

Charles Simeon, the great 19th-century English preacher, lived in this hope to the day of his death. As he lay mortally ill in his Cambridge home, he realized that his time on earth was fast slipping away. He turned to those at his bedside and asked, “Do you know what comforts me just now? I find infinite consolation in the fact that in the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.”

His friends asked him how that thought could give him solace as he faced death. He answered with the confidence of one about to meet his Lord, “Why, if God can bring all the wonder of the worlds out of nothing, He may still make something out of me!” - P.R.V.

All curiosity implies more or less skepticism and mental uneasiness. If our faith were unlimited, we should not seek to have so many questions answered. Imagine a physician whose fidelity and skill have inspired such confidence that, when he is called in, no one ever dreams of asking what treatment he is adopting or of cautiously checking his diagnosis; or a commander to whom his chief gives a free hand, not being asked to divulge his plan of campaign. The man is not yet born who commands that kind of unlimited confidence. But God demands and deserves this matchless honor. He ordains not a few of the mysteries that confront us so that we may have occasions for glorifying Him by our unquestioning trust in His wisdom and goodwill.

A pastor I know, Stephey Belynskyj, starts each confirmation class with a jar full of beans. He asks his students to guess how many beans are in the jar, and on a big pad of paper writes down their estimates. Then, next to those estimates, he helps them make another list: their favorite songs. When the lists are complete, he reveals the actual number of beans in the jar. The whole class looks over their guesses, to see which estimate was closest to being right. Belynskyj then turns to the list of favorite songs. “And which one of these is closest to being right?” he asks. The students protest that there is no “right answer”; a person’s favorite song is purely a matter of taste.

Belynskyj, who holds a Ph.D. in philosophy from Notre Dame asks, “When you decide what to believe in terms of your faith, is that more like guessing the number of beans, or more like choosing your favorite song?” Always, Belynskyj says, from old as well as young, he gets the same answer: Choosing one’s faith is more like choosing a favorite song.

When Belynskyj told me this, it took my breath away. “After they say that, do you confirm them?”

I asked him. “Well,” smiled Belynskyj, “First I try to argue them out of it.”

Sometime when you’re in an airport, observe the difference between passengers who hold confirmed tickets and those who are on standby. The ones with confirmed tickets read newspapers, chat with their friends or sleep. The ones on standby hang around the ticket counter, pace and smoke, smoke and pace.

The difference is caused by the confidence factor. If you knew that in fifteen minutes you would have to stand in judgment before the Holy God and learn your eternal destiny, what would your reaction be? Would you smoke and pace? Would you say to yourself, “I don’t know what God’s going to say--will it be ‘Welcome home, child,’ or will it be ‘Depart from me; I never knew you’?

Fair Conflict Management includes:

Dealing with one issue at a time,

If more than one issue is presented, agreeing on the order in which the issues will be addressed,

Exploring all the dimensions of the problem(s),

Exploring several alternative solutions to the problem(s).

If any party is uncomfortable with the forum in which the conflict is raised, it is legitimate to request and discuss what the most appropriate forum might be.

Inappropriate behavior in conflict includes, but is not limited to:

Name calling,

Mind reading (attributing evil motives to others),

Inducing guilt (“Look how you’ve made me feel”),

Rejecting, deprecating, or discrediting another person,

Using information from confidential sources or indicating that such information exists.

Fair conflict always allows people who are charged with poor performance or inappropriate behavior:

to know who their accusers are,

to learn what their accusers’ concerns are,

to respond to those who accuse.

A few years ago psychologist Ruth W. Berenda and her associates carried out an interesting experiment with teenagers designed to show how a person handled group pressure. The plan was simple.

They brought groups of ten adolescents into a room for a test. Subsequently, each group of ten was instructed to raise their hands when the teacher pointed to the longest line on three separate charts. What one person in the group did not know was that nine of the others in the room had been instructed ahead of time to vote for the second-longest line. Regardless of the instructions they heard, once they were all together in the group, the nine were not to vote for the longest line, but rather vote for the next to the longest line. The experiment began with nine teen-agers voting for the wrong line. The stooge would typically glance around, frown in confusion, and slip his hand up with the group. The instructions were repeated and the next card was raised. Time after time, the self-conscious stooge would sit there saying a short line is longer than a long line, simply because he lacked the courage to challenge the group.

This remarkable conformity occurred in about 75% of the cases, and was true of small children and high-school students as well. Berenda concluded that, “Some people had rather be president than right,” which is certainly an accurate assessment.

The need for honest confronting of issues with genuine caring for people is demonstrated by David Augsburger in his courageous and insightful book, Caring Enough to Confront. He lists how to confront and care at the same time.

ConfrontingCaring

I feel deeply about the issue at stake

I care about our relationship.

I want to clearly express my view

I want to hear your view.

I want respect for my view

I want to respect your insights.

I want you to trust me with your honest feelings

I trust you to be able to handle my honest feelings.

I want you to keep working with me until we’ve reached a new understanding.

I promise to stay with the discussion until we’ve reached an understanding.

I want your unpressured, clear, honest view our differences.

I will not trick, pressure, manipulate, or distort the differences between us.

I want your caring-confronting response

I give you my loving, honest respect.

Zeng Shen was young enough to be Confucius’s grandson, yet he won high praise from the old sage. One of the sayings for which Zeng Shen is famous goes something like this. “Every day I ask myself three questions. The first is, ‘Have I sinned in my thoughts and actions toward others?’ The second is, ‘Have I broken faith in any of my friendships?’ The third is, ‘Have I tried to teach anything to others I have not fully learned and understood myself?’” If Zeng Shen asked himself these three questions every day, resolving to make no mistakes, then, young as he was, we can well understand why Confucius praised him. Not only is each of the three questions extremely important in itself, but the practice of examining one’s own behavior every day is a habit that every leader should cultivate.

A university student was seen with a large “K” printed on his T-shirt. When someone asked him what the “K” stood for, he said, “Confused.” “But,” the questioner replied, “you don’t spell “confused” with a “K.” The student answered, “You don’t know how confused I am.”

Observe this random sampling of expressions of the Gospel taken from tracts, sermons, books, and radio and TV messages. I list them without documentation since the point is not who said these but what was said, and to illustrate how varied and confusing these statements are. If we gave even half of them to an unsaved person, which and what would he be expected to believe?

1. Repent, believe, confess your sin to God, and confess Him before men and you will be saved.

2. The clearest statement of the Gospel in the N. T. is found in Luke 9:23: “If any man wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.”

3. Perhaps the most comprehensive invitation to salvation in the epistles comes in James 4:7-10: “Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be miserable and mourn and weep; let your laughter be turned into mourning, and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.”

4. May the Lord reveal to the sinners that the only way for them to be saved from their sins is to repent with a godly sorrow in their hearts to the Lord.

5. Utter the prayer of the prodigal son—ask Jesus to be your Lord and Master.

6. Come forward and follow Christ in baptism.

7. Place your hand in the nail-scarred hands of Jesus

8. Find Christ by praying through to Him.

9. Believe in Him, trust Him, accept Him, commit your life to Him.

10. We have the warning of Christ that He will not receive us into His kingdom until we are ready to give up all, until we are ready to turn from all sin in our lives.

11. God offers eternal life freely to sinners who will surrender to Him in humble, repentant faith.

12. Do we literally have to give away everything we own to become Christians? No, but we do have to be willing to forsake all.

13. Matthew 7:13-14 is pure Gospel: “Enter by the narrow gate...”

14. No one can receive Christ as his Savior while he rejects Him as his Lord.

15. Give your heart to Christ.

Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listens, and then everybody disagrees...They’ve already started arguing over who will be the speaker at next year’s conventions. What they better worry about is who is going to listen.

Connie Mack was one of the greatest managers in the history of baseball. One of the secrets of his success was that he knew how to lead and inspire men. He knew that people were individuals. Once, when his team had clinched the pennant well before the season ended, he gave his two best pitchers the last ten days off so that they could rest up for the World Series. One pitcher spent his ten days off at the ball park; the other went fishing. Both performed brilliantly in the World Series. Mack never criticized a player in front of anyone else. He learned to wait 24 hours before discussing mistakes with players. Otherwise, he said, he dealt with goofs too emotionally.

In the first three years as a major league baseball manager, Connie Mack’s teams finished sixth, seventh, and eighth. He took the blame and demoted himself to the minor leagues to give himself time to learn how to handle men. When he came back to the major leagues again, he handled his players so successfully that he developed the best teams the world had ever known up to that time.

Mack had another secret of good management: he didn’t worry. “I discovered,” he explained, “that worry was threatening to wreck my career as a baseball manager. I saw how foolish it was and I forced myself to get so busy preparing to win games that I had no time left to worry over the ones that were already lost. You can’t grind grain with water that has already gone down the creek.”

Connie Mack was one of the greatest managers in the history of baseball. One of the secrets of his success was that he knew how to lead and inspire men. He knew that people were individuals. Once, when his team had clinched the pennant well before the season ended, he gave his two best pitchers the last ten days off so that they could rest up for the World Series. One pitcher spent his ten days off at the ball park; the other went fishing. Both performed brilliantly in the World Series. Mack never criticized a player in front of anyone else. He learned to wait 4 hours before discussing mistakes with players. Otherwise, he said, he dealt with goofs too emotionally. In the first three years as a major league baseball manager, Connie Mack’s teams finished sixth, seventh, and eighth. He took the blame and demoted himself to the minor leagues to give himself time to learn how to handle men. When he came back to the major leagues again, he handled his players so successfully that he developed the best teams the world had ever known up to that time. Mack had another secret of good management: he didn’t worry. “I discovered,” he explained, “that worry was threatening to wreck my career as a baseball manager. I saw how foolish it was and I forced myself to get so busy preparing to win games that I had no time left to worry over the ones that were already lost. You can’t grind grain with water that has already gone down the creek.”