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John Blazes the Trail

¹ This ain't about nothing except the good news of a man named Jesus, the Son of God. ² I reckon it all started when one of God's top hands, a fella named Isaiah, wrote this, "God said, 'I got a cowboy coming who is going to show you a new message and a new way of riding for me. ³ He's already shouting from the desert and tellin' y'all to get ready to saddle up for the Lord and ride right straight for him.'"

⁴ So John came out of nowhere, riding for God and baptizing folks. His message was plain and simple, "Quit riding in sin and be baptized and God will turn a blind eye to all the sorry things you've done." ⁵ Folks came from all around the country to hear this cowboy preach. Many a heart turned to God and they told of the sorry things they had done and old John dunked 'em in Jordan Creek.

⁶ John was a different sort of fellow. He wore a vest of camel hair with a stout leather belt holding his jeans up. He didn't waste no time with fancy vittles, but just ate locusts and wild honey. ⁷ He told people time and again, "The Top Hand is coming soon and I ain't worthy enough to pull his boots off after a long ride. ⁸ I dunk y'all in water, but he's gonna dunk you in the Holy Spirit."

The Dunkin' and the Seduction

⁹ It wasn't long before Jesus came riding down from the Nazareth country and told John to baptize him in Jordan Creek. ¹⁰ When Jesus came up out of the water, the sky split plumb apart and you could see right into heaven. And out of heaven come the Spirit of God like a dove and it came right down to him. ¹¹ Then there was a voice from heaven that said, "You are my Boy and that pleases me to no end." ¹² Then the Spirit of God led Jesus out into the wilds and the brush where there were no fences and things were hard to come by. ¹³ Jesus was out there for more'n forty days with nothing to eat and Satan tried to take him out time and again. Jesus spent all those nights surrounded by all sorts of predators, but God sent angels to take care of him.

¹⁴ After all this, old John was thrown in jail and Jesus went into the Galilee country to tell people the good news.

¹⁵ He told 'em, "Y'all been waiting for a long time and the Boss's Green Pasture has made it here. Quit riding in sin and tie hard and fast to the good news."

The First Cowboys

¹⁶ As Jesus rode along telling people this same message over and over, he run into a couple of fellows near the Sea of Galilee. These two cowboys, Simon and Andrew, were gathering some heifers. ¹⁷ Jesus hollered over to 'em and said, "Ride with me and I'll teach you how to gather cowboys." ¹⁸ They immediately coiled their ropes up and loped off after him. ¹⁹ As they were riding, they came upon a cowboy named James and his brother John. ²⁰ They were patching a water trough and Jesus told 'em to saddle up and ride with him. James and John left their old dad sitting there as they rode off with Jesus.

Jesus Whips a Demon

²¹ The cowboys rode all the way to Capernaum. When the day of rest came (the old timers called it the Sabbath), Jesus went up to the church building and began to give all them folks a clinic on what it means to ride for God. ²² These folks couldn't believe what he was teaching them. It was like he knew what he was talking about instead of being like those other preachers who just wanted to hear themselves talk and make up rules.

²³ Just then, a fellow who had an evil way about him shouted out, ²⁴ "You leave us alone Jesus! Have you come here to wipe us out? I know who you really are—God's Top Hand!"

²⁵ But Jesus shushed him with a look and without raising his voice he said, "Be quiet and come out." ²⁶ That fellow fell down like he'd been hit with a whiskey bottle and the evil spirit that had a hold of the him yelped like a whipped pup as it came out of the man.

²⁷ People stood there with their mouths hanging wide open and they turned to each other and said, "Did you see that? This cowboy is teaching us something new. He not only knows what he's doing, but even the evil spirits jump when he says to." ²⁸ Word spread quickly in the country around Galilee about this new cowboy with a new way. ²⁹ When they left the church, they rode over to Simon and Andrew's line camp.

Jesus Fixes a Lot of Folks

James and John were still with them and as they all walked in, ³⁰ it was apparent that Simon's mother-in-law had something bad sick about her. They were asking Jesus what should be done when ³¹ he just pushed passed them, took her by the hand, and helped her stand up. By the time she reached her feet, she was as right as spring rain. She felt so good she went in and fried up some frijoles and tortillas.

³² That evening, people started coming by the line camp and asking Jesus to fix all those people who had an evil way about them or³³ those who were feeling mighty poorly. ³⁴ Jesus fixed ever' single one of 'em. He didn't let any of the demons open their mouths because they knew who he was and Jesus wasn't ready for everyone to know just yet.

Jesus Gathers in Galilee

³⁵ The next morning, Jesus was saddled up way before daylight. He rode a far piece out into the pasture to be alone and pray. ³⁶ Simon and the other cowboys looked and looked for him. ³⁷ When they finally found him, they said, "Everyone is scouring the country for you."

³⁸ Jesus swung up in the saddle and said, "Let's make a big circle into the surrounding country so I can tell people the good news. That's why my Dad sent me." ³⁹ So Jesus and his cowboys rode all through Galilee where Jesus gave clinics in the churches and cast out many a demon along the way.

Jesus Heels a Fella with Rotten Skin

⁴⁰ A man with rotting skin came to Jesus and fell down in front of him, asking him for help. "If you had a mind to, I know you could fix me, Jesus."

⁴¹ Jesus was touched by this man's way of asking and he felt sorry for him. Jesus reached out to the man and touched him, saying, "I am of a mind—be fixed!"

⁴² The rotting skin immediately fell off him and he was clean. ⁴³ But Jesus gave him a stern warning before he let him go, ⁴⁴ "Don't tell anyone what happened here. Just go to the church and show 'em that you're clean. Take along the offering that Moses said to bring for your fixing."

⁴⁵ But that fellow couldn't keep quiet about the great thing Jesus had done for him. Word spread around so quickly that Jesus couldn't even come into town because of the mobs of people that came to him. Because of this, he camped way out where it was hard to find him, but people still came to find him from all parts of the region.